A confident and elegant businesswoman standing in front of a brick wall with soft cracks of light breaking through, symbolizing breaking down emotional barriers in marriage. The image represents strength, vulnerability, and transformation in balancing success and love.

The Boss Lady’s Marriage Struggle: When Strength Becomes a Wall Instead of a Bridge

boss lady mindset breaking emotional walls faith & marriage high-achieving women kingdom marriage letting love in love & vulnerability marriage & success strong women in love taming the gypsy heart Feb 24, 2025

I built a life that looked successful.
I built a business that thrived.
I built a name that carried weight.

But I also built walls—walls so high, even the man I loved couldn’t get in.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but my hyper-independence wasn’t strength—it was a trauma response. A way to protect myself from disappointment, betrayal, and letdowns. When you’ve spent years learning to rely on no one but yourself, love feels more like a threat than a safe place.

💔 I trusted myself to win in business, but I didn’t trust myself to be fully seen in marriage.

And if I’m being honest? I didn’t trust him to hold my heart, either.

Success in Business, Failure in Vulnerability

High-achieving women know how to get things done.
We lead. We build. We execute.
But what happens when those same strengths become the very thing that isolates us?

I ran my marriage like a business. I made the plans. I made the calls. I stayed two steps ahead so I wouldn’t have to need anyone. Because needing meant vulnerability. And vulnerability meant risk.

I would tell myself:
🚨 “If I don’t let him in too deep, he can’t hurt me.”
🚨 “If I stay strong, I won’t be disappointed.”
🚨 “If I just keep doing more, I’ll feel fulfilled.”

But no matter how successful I became, I still felt alone.

The Moment I Realized I Had to Change

In Taming the Gypsy Heart, I talk about how my walls started cracking the moment my husband and I took dance lessons.

💃🕺 Dancing requires the woman to let the man lead.

For the first time, I had to stop anticipating, stop controlling, stop doing, and just… follow.
And let me tell you—that was HARD.

But something happened in that moment: I felt safe.
Because for once, I wasn’t trying to prove, push, or perfect anything.
I was just there—trusting, receiving, allowing.

And isn’t that exactly what love is supposed to be?

Your Success Can’t Replace Your Deepest Need

Strong, driven women—you are incredible. You are powerful. You are capable.

But love doesn’t work the way business does. You can’t lead in the boardroom and bring that same hard-charging, hyper-independent energy into your marriage and expect deep, soul-fulfilling connection.

💡 What if you let your husband lead?
💡 What if you stopped trying to control the outcome and let yourself be fully seen?
💡 What if you softened—not because you’re weak, but because you’re safe?

I know this struggle because I lived it.
And that’s why I wrote Taming the Gypsy Heart—because I had to learn the hard way how to stop running, stop controlling, and truly let love in.

And now? I help other high-achieving, powerhouse women finally step into the love they’ve been craving.

✨ If this hit home for you, it’s time to break down those walls. Grab my book today and start the journey to a marriage that’s built on real connection—not just routine.

📖 Get your copy of Taming the Gypsy Heart here.

🔥 Tell me—do you resonate with this? Have you ever felt like your independence was a wall in your marriage? Let’s talk in the comments. ⬇️

I am rooting for you!!

Coach Rach

P.S. If you are ready to tear down the walls and really experience intimacy in your marriage like never before, lets connect on a call to see if you are a good fit to coach with me!

Click here to see if you qualify for my coaching